Fashion Rant (Again…Still)


I hate clothes.

Okay, no, not quite. I’m very attached to some of my sweaters. But I struggle – a lot – with clothes.

This comes from two main problems:

1. I don’t know what I like.

2. I don’t know where to find things other than what I’ve already seen and am convinced I don’t like.

Oh yeah, and the psychological hangups from years of shopping with my controlling mother. But that’s another matter.

What pisses me off about what I see at Forever 21 and everywhere else that fashion-smart people my age shop is that all of it is SO. EXTREME.

The skirts are either floor-length or upper thigh.

The shorts are either knee-length or upper thigh.

The shoes are either sky-high or have no arch at all.

The shoes either have fourteen combinations of straps or are just a couple tacked-together pieces of leather.

The shirts are either deep necklines or crop tops.

The shirts either have no sleeves at all or are flannels.

The shirts either have no shoulders and cut off above the belly button, or there are holes cut throughout. (Dresses do the deep neckline/holes cut in it thing too.)

The jewelry is either bigger than your face or indiscernible from the pattern on your clothing – and all of it has everything but the kitchen sink on it, and all of it has to make a statement.

The patterns are either nonexistent or eye-boggling. In the case of floral ones, I don’t want to look like the living room couch, but I wouldn’t mind looking like an English bedsheet. I mean, come on. Also, daisies are nice, but there are other flowers; be imaginative.

(Also, the tribal print is everywhere, but that’s a personal pet peeve.)

What I would like to see is BASICITY (regardless of whether that’s a word or not). I don’t need the latest artsy holes in my jeans; I don’t want a big old kiss mark in the middle of an otherwise very nice sweater. I don’t need more than a couple humble pendants and I don’t think heels that make me a foot taller are necessary. I want to dress honestly and simply, and I cannot understand why I cannot find it in departments and fits geared toward my age group.

Okay, there you go. That’s the best I can do about my fashion rant.


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